Repeal Women's Rights

Mary Wollstonecraft. Ever heard of her? She was an 18th century writer, philosopher, and feminist. She opposed the subjugation of women, particularly in marriage, and was a prolific writer. She wrote sparkling political essays, thought provoking philosophical treatises, and captivating works of fiction. While reading, if I was any more obsessive, I might have found myself in an unfortunate love affair with her. The droves of you who are envious of this sentiment can be relieved that she died over 200 years ago.

She compared marriage to an insane asylum, whereby the woman, as the inmate, was subject to her husband's wishes. This was the plot in her novel, Maria. Indeed, physical and verbal abuse, neglect, and even rape were seldom if ever valid crimes if perpetuated by a husband against his spouse. Women in general had very little legal recognition by themselves. It seems like an awful state of affairs intolerable by any sensible woman.

Mary experienced the wrath of men first hand as the child of a reckless husband, later as a friend/lover of a woman in an abusive marriage, and then herself the subject of a distant husband. She seems to have had little reason to care for men at all given her experiences. Yet, her writing inspired the greatest romantic poets of all time including William Wordsworth and Samuel Taylor.

After decades of misery, suicide attempts, and loneliness, her final months were spent in happiness with her lover, William Godwin. She died shortly after their relationship began, and he was left to publish much of her work, including the love letters she had written to her former husband. Sound familiar? Yes, it's the real life Moulin Rouge. And, it's available for all to see. I warn anyone who follows this path to prepare for a heart wrenching tale. (After having to much time at work, I found myself mercilessly sucked into them.)

I truly wonder how a soul so bitten by men could have any affection for them whatsoever. Her writing begs the question...should women have rights at all? Maybe they were simply designed to be locked up in cages so they could write eloquent tales of the relentless human spirit...rage against depression, that sort of thing.

Yes, I said it. Us men need to ban together and repeal all women's rights, down to the last one. I say they have one right; to live in our private dungeons writing brilliant essays and love letters. What?