Showing posts with label politics. Show all posts
Showing posts with label politics. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Friday, September 17, 2010

Lady Gaga on National Defense

Lady Gaga insists senators "do their job," repeal Don't Ask Don't Tell, and permit closet homosexuals in the military to identify themselves. Further, she believes the prohibition of openly gay soldiers in the military "infringes on of civil rights."

This story is from the front page of CNN.

I wonder why more pop singers aren't making their contribution to these crucial matters of national defense policy. I, for one, see no reason why Nora Jones hasn't used her success in music to change politics for the better, specifically, to compel officers and generals to disclose their sexual orientation and those of members of their battalions. Indeed, is the whole music industry derelict in their responsibility to advance the public good by ignoring these important matters! After all, we're the world's last superpower. You'd think one member of Cake could give a shout out for the closeted fairy in Company B. What has this world come to when our most talented American icons are helpless to wield the legislative pen?

How are our politicians supposed to know what the hell to do without sages like Gaga telling them what the populous thinks? Have we descended so far into anarchy that the words of a woman so well-known, so in-your-face, can do nothing to shape the future of our military policy?

Let us all breathe a sigh of relief that Gaga will not be ignored. Yes, her words, and the exposure of the National Media will persuade, cajole, and outright stuff the ballot box to ensure the mob of the majority usurps reason at every opportunity.

I am not afraid that gay men will soon be permitted to identify potential sexual partners in their barracks, and even have incentive to join the military in order to do so.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Puzzled

We have a severe problem. A puzzle to solve. You see, everything was just fine before, when we all ate what grew on trees and drank what flowed in streams. You know, we got by alright, trading what we harvested or made for things that other people harvested or made. But now, look at all the things made! They want computers and cars and all sorts of stuff. And, well, people will make whatever anyone could possibly dream of. They sky is really the limit. All that is required is a lot of money, and someone will think of a way to create it...eventually. Flying cars, nitrogen widgets, whatever. That's the whole problem!

We need people to stop wanting all these things. It truly causes a large amount of effort on our part. As one puzzle is solved, we move on to the next one, and the next, just solving one puzzle after another until we have jet packs and restorative nano bots and really good coffee filters. I truly fear there is no end to this cycle, as I ponder this other puzzle before me...the one of disintegrating all the others...of telling the world we don't really all need, hm, let's say cars with navigation systems...

All those thousands of people out there solved this great big puzzle. They made it impossible to get lost by creating a device that yells at us every time we need to make a turn...screaming over any conversation we might be having...as if the puzzle that was solved is so much more important than the puzzle being solved by the riding conversationalists. But remember that there was a time when humans remembered how to get places. It could be done, and the brain power required was not that prohibitive. Now, instead of being able to delight in the puzzle that always allowed us that welcome distraction of finding out how to get where we're going, we have a substitute distraction of trying to find some way to coexist peacefully while a computerized voice interrupts us every few minutes (after the novelty of trying different voices fades away into that dull, complacent dependency...eventually drooling over ourselves, trying to remember which way was right and which way was left).

Isn't it ironic that, in a time on unprecedented abundance, we also have unprecedented want? I forget the definition of irony, having delighted in a lifetime of lax education and intellectual laziness required to succeed in our times. Maybe now is an appropriate time to snub intellect and civilization altogether, pointing to our great prosperity as evidence that such things are not required in the modern world, much less education. Education?! You are living in the dark ages, my friend. We don't need no education. What we need is a facade of education that relies on commercial-style appeals to human weakness...like smiling children holding books! Yes, LOTS OF SMILING CHILDREN HOLDING BOOKS is excellent promotional material. This way, children will think that books will bring them happiness and affection...just the act of reading a book, whatever book, and completely regardless of any comprehension. And, while they hold books that remind them that they are perfect whatever they do, their parents will think their kids are actually learning something. All the while, generations come to believe that everybody is okay no matter what they do or say, and that all we need for a successful society is to encourage the laziness of ourselves and others through low expectations. All the while, as cartoon characters advocate weakness to pleasure, vanity, and laziness, we plant profitable seeds in these young minds...seeds that ease the commercial mandate of persuasion necessary to turn a "citizen" into a "consumer."

They are the loving, tolerant, politically correct, compassionate, friendly, well-intentioned, harmless tools that require a hefty expense for 18 years, but subsequent decades of low hanging fruit for the esteemed corporate partners. But it gets better, as these precious cogs assure each other with every breath that all that glitters is indeed gold...and that it is gold worth every puzzle ever assembled and all that will be...and that this is to continue until the last person on earth has died without needing to lift one finger in search of a map...until all suffer nothing but the arduous puzzle of identifying every slightest whim to relieve, then to have it satisfied instantly for the duration of his 100 years plugged into his pleasure machine.

It is his throne, where he rules a universe of his own mindless altruist minions. It is a population he, himself, has cleverly learned to control in every way, carving them out in the way that relieves his slightest dissatisfaction, like scratching a subtle itch, first with the property of one population, then with the freedom of another, until they claw over each other's backs to delight his will, all to impress one another with the tokens he tosses them...all to become this laughing, proud, delirious master themselves. Surely no puzzle could be more honorable, more desirous that this one, as I resume my tiny part toward this universal goal...one small contributor to the balancing of life down to a flat line of perpetual self-gratification that is to define our species. Back to the puzzle.

Friday, March 27, 2009

Trouble in Geitnerville

Today, children, let's visit three inhabitants of the tiny village of Geitnerville.
  • Meet Larry. Larry is a farmer. He produces food.
  • Meet Barry. Barry is a builder. He builds houses and barns.
  • Now meet Mary. Mary is a seamstress. She makes clothing.
Larry Mary and Barry lived peacefully on the outskirts of town, just on the edge of the countryside. They were pioneers in their time, having uprooted everything to escape the perils of the east in search of a better life. They traveled to Geitnerville in covered wagons, settling on the lonesome prairie where they were delighted to find a place where they believed hard work just might bless them with an honest, rewarding life. Let's learn about how these courageous, hard-working folks spent their daily lives among the tall grass and tumbleweeds, and how Geitnerville became the vastly different place it is today.

Let's take a regular Monday in the early days, just after Geitnerville was founded. On these calm summer mornings Larry would awaken to the familiar call of the rooster, don his overalls and boots, and walk across the yard to his tiny chicken cage. It was a small and rickety old structure, and occupied with as many chickens as it could house. There he would feed and water the fluttering birds and gather all the eggs, placing them carefully into a straw basket cushioned by tufts of hay. As the sun would just begin to illuminate the purple clouds Larry would walk over to Mary's house. He usually had, oh, from about 6 to 8 eggs.

The dirt path to Mary's place wound over some hills, through some woods, and right past the property of our builder, Barry. Barry was a gruff, disagreeable man, with "No Trespassing" signs posted all along the outskirts of his land. Larry would usually see Barry hammering nails into some building during these morning excursions, and the two rarely spoke. Barry was always building something. One day, Barry was working on the tall wooden fence that buttressed the side of the dirt path, perched a few yards high. He didn't notice that Larry had approached. He was standing almost directly beneath him when he shouted a greeting:

"Good morning to you Barry!"

Barry looked down at Larry for a moment with iron nails sticking out of his mouth. He mumbled something, and then resumed his hammering. Larry continued...

"Say, Barry, I've got a couple extra eggs this morning. Would you like them?"

Larry wasn't sure if Barry heard him over the pounding of nails, and was about to repeat himself when he saw the hammer bounce off a post and fall to the ground. Barry grunted, and looked down for a moment, reaching to the side of his tool belt for his extra hammer. Larry noticed two hammers sat on the ground next to each other. "Oh, he must have dropped both his hammers," thought Larry, and saving Barry the trip down from the fence, decided he would be helpful and hand them up.

Seeing Larry reach for one of the hammers, Barry jumped off the fence and landed hard on the ground, tumbling a bit. It was quite a distance. He rose to his feet and snatched the hammer from Larry's hand.

"Just what do you think you're doing, Mr., um, what's your name again?"

"Larry. I'm the farmer who lives down the path over the hill."

"Oh, right, well, you can keep your hands off of my property, Larry. I'll do just fine by myself, thank you."

"I was only trying to help. So, will you take these two extra eggs? If you don't want them they will go to waste."

"Ya," said Barry, "sure am hungry."

Larry handed a gift of the smallest two eggs to Barry, who took them and walked back to his house without saying a word. Larry had never met so gruff a man, but was glad his two extra eggs didn't go to waste.

Larry continued on his journey to Mary's place, which was down a slope in the heart of the river valley. When he got there, Mary and Larry ate breakfast together. In return for his eggs, Mary gave Larry all kinds of clothes...hats, scarves, shirts, and gloves. Mary was the best seamstress around, so Larry preferred to exchanged his eggs for the clothes Mary made. On this particular morning, Larry received some work gloves, as his had almost worn out.

Larry could never stay long at Mary's place. There was a lot of work to do back at the farm. That day, on the way back from Mary's, Larry saw Barry again working on the fence. Larry waved at Barry on his way past and Barry seemed to ignore him. Then, after Larry had passed by, the pounding of nails stopped for a moment and Barry hollered:

"Hey, Larry, you got any more of those eggs!?"

Larry turned around and walked back to where Barry was sitting way up on the fence.

"Sorry, Larry, I'm all out today. But most days I have one or two extra. Would you like me to bring you some tomorrow again on my way to Mary's place?"

Barry, raised his hand to his chin, thinking for a moment.

"Those eggs were tasty. Larry, tell me, do you need anything built on your farm?"

Larry was surprised as he looked up at Barry, who had always been quite uncharitable and a bit of a recluse. Larry had, in fact, been planning to build a new chicken coop himself, but never had the time. There were simply too many other things to do on the farm.

"Well, Barry, I do need a larger chicken coop. I could sure use your help sometime if you're not too busy."

"I will build it for you myself, Larry, if you promise to give me two eggs every morning. I'll build it just like the one I built for Henry."

Larry knew a chicken coop like Henry's was exactly what he needed. With it, he could raise many more chickens in the future and assure himself many extra eggs. But, he would need to get by with very little while it was being built. He looked at Barry, arms folded, waiting for his response. Everyone knew that Barry was a good builder, and a man who kept his word. He thought about how many eggs he could spare. It wasn't very many, but there was no harm in offering them.

"I can spare two eggs a day for the next 60 days if you will build me a chicken coop like Henry's."

Barry extended his hand and Larry shook it, wincing at the extremely firm grasp. Then, Barry nodded earnestly, turned around, and dutifully walked back to his fence. Larry continued on his journey back to his farm and spent the rest of the day finishing his chores. There was a full day of work ahead of him, as usual, and no time to lose as he skillfully worked his fields.

As Larry dug his hoe into the rich soil he pondered the seemingly magical quality of his agreement. He, of course, always took good care to understand every aspect of his activities, and knew this promise with Barry included some undeniable risks. He thought about all the many possibilities:
  • Would the chickens lay enough eggs?
  • Would Barry build it well and in a reasonable amount of time?
  • What if Barry got hurt somehow or the chickens died of disease?
  • Or, what if any number of unexpected things happened?
There was no way to know, with absolute certainty, that Barry would actually build the chicken coop. At the same time, Larry could not be absolutely certain that he would be able to give Barry the eggs as promised. In fact, when he really thought about it, he wondered how he could have possibly made such a claim. What he and Barry actually did was make a prediction about the future. They both made assumptions that the other could accurately make this prediction, even though both knew it was absolutely impossible to do such a thing.

Yet, if he did deliver the eggs, his prediction would come true, and Barry would see that not only was he a farmer, but a person capable of foretelling the future. This seemed like a risky, but thrilling proposition, and Larry was far from a coward. "Why not," he thought. After all, he depended on his own predictions all the time. Without them he could not live. He always predicted that...
  • The snow would melt in the spring. It always did.
  • The rain would water his fields. It (almost) always did.
  • The seeds would grow into plants. Yes.
  • The plants would bear food for him to eat. Yes.
All of this happened with enough regularity that he could depend upon it. He realized that if he did not make predictions, he would starve. Larry decided he could, in some sense, follow the example of the crops and the seasons. If he kept his word, and delivered the eggs as promised, Barry could depend on him like one depends on the seasons. Also, if Barry built his coop, he knew that he would trust Barry's strong handshake in the future.

"Wouldn't it be great," Larry thought, "if it was a fact that predictions could be made about other people? That would mean wonderful things."

He realized that if Barry could transform 60 days worth of eggs into a chicken coop, from Barry's point of view, Larry would transform some time and labor into delicious eggs. This had wonderous implications. That meant that one day, perhaps, eggs could be transformed into other things too...even a new barn. After all, his new chicken coop would mean more eggs.

Larry knew it was a risk, but it was a risk he was willing to take, because of the many years he had spent making good predictions for himself. Still, he was a bit nervous about this new idea, and was willing to go hungry if he needed to to make sure Barry got those eggs. If he could prove this new talent of his...making predictions...he could accomplish many things never before possible.

The next morning Larry awoke from his restless slumber at the usual time, but, something was different. Along side the rooster, Larry heard the sounds of sawing and hammering. Startled, he hurriedly stood up from his bed and rushed to the window. To his astonishment, there was Barry, already hard at work building the new chicken coop!

Larry got dressed, walked across the yard, and gathered the eggs for himself and Mary as the pounding and sawing continued. As he walked by Barry, he shouted:

"I left two eggs for you in the old coop. There's a frying pan in the kitchen. The door's open."

Barry looked up from the wood he was sawing long enough to nod, then continued to concentrate on his work. Larry made due with one egg for breakfast that day, and every day for the rest of the week, making sure Barry got the two he was promised. Even if he was a bit hungry, this new idea was working far better than expected. By Friday, the new coop was finished, and Larry moved his chickens.

Larry was amazed at how fast Barry completed the project, and how soon he was able to begin expanding his flock. But, he was still very hungry, not having enough eggs for himself. At first he questioned whether he made the right decision, not realizing that his supply of eggs would be stressed so much. But, as the weeks and months passed, Larry was able to triple the number of chickens, and eventually he could count on enough eggs for both Barry and himself, as well as the ones he needed to trade to Mary for her clothing.

Barry was quite satisfied with Larry, and received his eggs every day for the full 60 days. He learned that Larry was good for his word, and continued to build additional projects for Larry in exchange for an even greater quantity of eggs, which were now available in abundance.

This was the routine in Geitnerville for many years.

Finally, one day, Larry decided he was tired of walking over to Mary's place all the time. And, he now had even more eggs than Barry needed. So, he gave Ziggy one egg each morning to carry the other eggs to Barry and Mary and bring back the clothes from Mary. Ziggy delivered all sorts of things to and from all three, and was able to live comfortably on the eggs, clothes, and even a small hut built by Barry in return for his delivery services. With every new project and agreement, it became more certain that his predictions could be trusted, and that they were beneficial to everyone involved.

But, there was a problem.

Barry learned that he also liked ham with his eggs.

Hearing this, and liking ham himself, Larry decided that he would raise hogs in addition to chickens, so that one day he could afford to ask Barry to build him a barn. Barry agreed that he would build the barn, so long as he had ham every morning with his eggs for 100 days. They signed the agreement that Barry would begin work after the first three weeks of ham and egg breakfasts.

By now Larry had several extra chickens, and traded 6 for a hog. (He learned that things were just as easily traded for other things as they were for time and labor.)

But, one hog was enough for many, many breakfasts. This was a conundrum. Larry wondered how he could provide Barry with ham every morning when meat only lasted a day before it went bad. He certainly couldn't butcher one hog every day and waste almost all of it...he would be out of chickens to trade in days. So, Larry told Ziggy to deliver a hog to Baxter the butcher so the meat could be smoked and preserved. Baxter, who lived in town, agreed to preserve the meat, but, the preserved meat only lasted a week and there was enough to feed one man months of breakfasts.

Baxter had a solution.

"I will give you 8 pieces of silver in order to keep the extra ham."

Larry found this ridiculous. He responded,

"What will I do with silly pieces of metal?"

Baxter explained that Larry could use the silver to help acquire another hog. "In fact, Jim, the man who raises hogs will give you a hog for 12 pieces of silver," said Baxter, "you can exchange the 8 pieces of silver and two chickens to get your next hog, rather than trading a full 6 chickens as you did before."

Larry had never seen or touched silver in his life. He didn't see how the tiny pieces of shiny metal could be exchanged for things, but he knew he could trust Baxter. If it was true, that he could take the silver to Jim in return for a very cheap hog (only 2 chickens!), he would be able to maintain a steady supply of ham for Barry's breakfasts. This meant all he had to do was tell Ziggy, once a week, to deliver the hog to Baxter, bring back the 8 pieces of silver and the week's worth of preserved ham, then, tell Ziggy to take two chickens and the silver to Jim, and bring back another hog. He knew he was depending on his predictions, but he had learned to trust Ziggy and Barry, and had no reason to assume he couldn't also trust Baxter. Besides, this is what it would take in order for Barry to build his barn. Barry would not build the barn without ham. Larry knew that once he had a barn, he could raise hogs himself, and wouldn't have to trade chickens or silver for them at all!

And, he had a little known secret he kept all to himself...he knew that even if Ziggy and Baxter let him down, he still had enough eggs to survive under the power of his own hard work. After much thought, this was the final reason he decided to proceed on the quest for his barn.

On the first day of this grand experiment everything went according to plan. Ziggy brought the hog to town where Baxter exchanged it for a week's worth of smoked ham and 8 pieces of silver. Ziggy carried the ham and silver to back to Larry. Larry grabbed two chickens and the silver, and headed over to Jim's place to trade it for another hog while Ziggy carried ham and eggs to Barry, who was busy drafting up a barn design, and eggs to Mary. Mary had a shirt to trade for the eggs. So, Ziggy carried the shirt back to Larry's farm, and arrived about the same time as Larry returned from Jim's place with the new hog. But, to Larry's delight, the hog only required 6 pieces of silver instead of 8 because his chickens were extra plump. So, Larry hid one extra silver piece under his mattress, and gave the other extra one to Ziggy. Other people around Geitnerville were trying to get Ziggy to carry things around, and Larry wanted to be sure Ziggy would continue to work for him.

Everyone was benefiting from this arrangement, even Baxter, who happened to acquire his silver by selling the extra smoked ham to travelers and other town folk. In fact, pieces of silver became quite popular indeed. While Larry was able to farm and continue to offer eggs and ham to Barry, he was also able to save 1 silver piece a week. At the same time, visitors from far away lands would sell farming tools that made Larry's job easier. In fact, when Larry had saved enough silver he purchased a steel plow and an ox. This allowed him to grow more corn, which allowed him to feed more chickens and hogs. Before long, Baxter had so much delicious smoked ham that he lowered the price in order to sell it all before it went bad. As a result, people traveled from far and wide to purchase it.

One day, Larry asked Barry if he would accept silver as payment instead of ham and eggs. Barry thought that was a great idea. Then, he asked Mary if she would take silver as payment instead of eggs. Mary also agreed. It turns out everyone liked silver for the same reason Larry did. Barry traded the silver for building tools and Mary traded her silver for finest, most durable fabric. With the extra tools, Barry was able to finish Larry's barn well ahead of schedule, and Mary's work gloves and overalls were lasting Larry twice as long as before. This allowed Larry to save even more of his silver, Mary to charge a bit more for her clothes, and Barry to finish the barn early and get started with other projects.

In fact, one day Barry met with Ziggy and Baxter. The three of them decided to build a market in the middle of town. Barry and his builders would build the market. Ziggy and his helpers would bring food to the market from Larry's farm, and other farms. Baxter would smoke and prepare the food for purchase. Before long, Larry didn't have to bring food to anyone himself. And, he no longer needed to acquire hogs from Jim now that he raised his own in the barn Barry built for him. Ziggy's helpers brought all the food to market, and everyone simply went to the market to purchase his food.

One day, Ziggy came to Larry's farm and handed Larry the bag of silver from Baxter. Larry reached in, handed Ziggy his payment of 4 silver pieces, and placed the rest in his pocket. Ziggy took the silver piece, dropped it in his own bag, and emptied his own collection of silver pieces into his hand. Larry was amazed. Ziggy had saved a large handful of silver.

"I would like to purchase one hog and two dozen eggs from you, Larry. I will pay you 50 silver pieces for it."

Larry was surprised. He had only sold his hogs to Baxter. Ziggy was just the delivery man.

"If I sell the hog and eggs to you, I won't have any for Baxter," said Larry.

"I know, but you will have the same amount of silver. Besides, I intend to sell the hog and eggs to Baxter. This way, you do not need to pay me a delivery fee, as I will keep the extra silver from the transaction."

Larry rubbed his chin, and after some discussion, finally agreed to take the 50 pieces of silver for a hog and 2 dozen eggs. He realized that Ziggy's 50 pieces of silver was just as good as anyone's.

So, in other words, instead of collecting silver in exchange for food and delivering it back to Larry, Ziggy was actually purchasing the eggs and ham directly from Barry with silver, and then selling it to Baxter at the market for a bit more silver than he gave to Larry for the food. When everybody first learned that he was doing this, they did not like it.

One day, as Ziggy was carrying food from Larry's farm to the market, Mary approached Ziggy. She told Ziggy she knew what he was doing. She said:

"I know you gave Larry 50 silver pieces for those ham and eggs. And, I also know that Baxter will pay you 55 silver pieces for those exact same ham and eggs when you get to the market. How can the same food be worth 50 silver pieces at Larry's farm and 55 silver pieces at the market? What do you have to say for yourself?"

"I never really saw it that way," said Ziggy. "I am only saving Larry the trouble of waiting for his payment. You see, I once carried all those ham and eggs to you and Barry and others each morning and then returned the next day to give Larry the silver you paid him for his food. Then, he would give me a portion of that silver for delivering those goods. Before long, I brought back 55 pieces of silver on every trip and he paid me 4 pieces for the fast and safe delivery. Well, one day, when I had saved enough silver, I offered to take the food and pay him 50 pieces on the spot. Larry was amazed that I would buy it all. He asked why I would do such a thing. I told him that I was going to sell all the food to Baxter for 55 pieces of silver and keep those 5 pieces instead of the 4 he would have otherwise paid me. Larry thought about it. He decided he liked receiving the silver right away. It allowed him to buy more hogs that particular day. So he agreed to accept 50 pieces instead of the 51 he would have received the next morning (after paying me 4 pieces). Then, Baxter paid me the same 55 pieces as before and I could afford to purchase more food from Larry the next day and do the same thing. Do you see, Mary? I'm just doing what anybody could do. You can be sure that if anyone else offered Larry more than 50 pieces of silver for this food he would sell it to them instead of me. Also, if Baxter could buy the food for less than 55 pieces from anyone else, he certainly would. So, in order to make my small profit, I must pay a specific amount to Larry, and sell at a specific price to Baxter."

Mary was impressed with Ziggy's explanation, and understood that there was nothing at all wrong with Ziggy's plan. She understood that he was simply earning an honest living by hauling food from one place to another, and that both Larry and Barry approved of the arrangement. Then, she looked down at the pile of shirts in her arm...

"Say, I was expecting to walk all the way to the market and spend all day selling these shirts. I would much rather go back to my house so I can spend that time making more shirts. I was expecting to trade them for 20 pieces of silver. I will sell them to you right now for 18 pieces."

Ziggy thought about the extra weight the shirts would add to the cart he was pulling. He thought about how busy the market would be, and what he would do with the shirts if they didn't sell. He figured he could sell them at a later time if they didn't sell right away. Then, he looked down at his tattered shirt, smiled, and made his decision.

"Yes, Mary, I would be glad to purchase your shirts. In fact, I will wear one myself to show everyone at the market how comfortable and stylish your clothes are."

Mary handed the shirts to Ziggy and Ziggy dropped 18 pieces of silver into Mary's hand. Mary smiled broadly and they both cordially bowed their heads and went on their way. Secretly, Mary knew that she would have gladly accepted as few as 15 pieces of silver for those shirts. At the same time, Ziggy knew that not only did he need a new shirt, but that he would be able to sell the others for at least 25 pieces of silver, which he later did. Both Ziggy and Mary could have received more silver from the transaction, but neither complained.

About this time Larry was getting enough silver from Ziggy to pay helpers to plant and harvest the corn and raise the chickens and hogs. Barry had enough silver to pay fellow builders to help him with his construction projects. Mary had enough silver to pay seamstresses to help her make more clothes. So many people came to Geitnerville to sell their products that many decided to move there permanently. The new residents all traded their silver for food, houses, and clothes, and Larry, Barry, and Mary were always very busy.

Larry was so busy that he stopped farming altogether, and spent all of his time managing his helpers and dealing with his large collection of silver. By now, Larry had a whole dresser drawer filled with silver. This pile of metal wasn't doing him much good just sitting there, so he hired Barry to build a grainery. Barry was already too busy building houses, so Barry's partner, Terry, built it instead. Then, Larry decided he needed new clothes, because all of his farm clothes were worn out. He hired Mary and her helpers to sew him a new wardrobe. Ziggy also had so much silver that he was able to buy a large carriage and Baxter now had an enormous market in the middle of town.

Baxter was selling so much ham that he offered Larry much silver for many more hogs. In order to raise the hogs Larry invited many more helpers, which he paid with silver. Ziggy paid his own army of helpers a portion of his silver, and Barry paid his many builders a portion of his, as did Mary, who now had a bustling clothing store. Larry, Barry, Mary, and Ziggy needed so much help that the tiny village quickly expanded to a township and then a city.

One evening, as Larry was relaxing, reading a newspaper, he heard a knock at the door. He opened the door to find a visitor he had never met before.

"Greetings, Larry, my name is Timothy Geitner. I am here to relieve you of your silver."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me."

Larry looked behind Mr. Geitner and saw five men with rifles pointed directly at him.

"But Mr. Geitner, this is not my silver. These are simply pieces of metal that represent the hogs and chickens I am obligated to deliver to my customers. They are simply placeholders for time and labor of the people I have made agreements with. I must ask you to leave these pieces of metal alone for the sake of, well, everyone in town."

"I'm sorry, but this is my silver now. I have renamed the city 'Geitnerville,' and now lay claim to all of your money."

The city had been named something else up until that point. No one today remembers what it was.

Then, Timothy and the men with guns entered Larry's house and loaded his silver into wheelbarrows, then emptied it onto their large cart along with all the other silver in town and carried it away.

The next day everyone in town gathered on Larry's farm wondering what to do. Larry reminded everyone how he and Barry and Marry and Ziggy were all able to get along just fine before any of them had even seen a piece of silver. He told them the story of how years ago he carried eggs to Barry in return for his new chicken coop, and how it was the trust and hard work between Larry and Barry that allowed them to succeed. He reminded them that all trades are nothing more than a bond of trust between two or more people, and that silver is only as valuable as the trust behind it.

Now that we know a character like Timothy Geitner can simply haul away this means of exchange, it is no longer backed by trust anyway, and is completely worthless. Therefore, citizens of Geitnerville, I ask you to follow the example of Barry, Mary, Ziggy, Baxter, Jim, and myself, who will be writing signed contracts with each other for all of our trades. When you see our signature, you will honor it as well as you honor our word.

Most of all, look around you. Look at the good people you have worked with for so many years. These are honest, hard-working, trustworthy people, and you know as well as I that their promise is worth more silver that all the piles in Mr. Geitner's grand estate.

Alright folks, you get it. Let's get back to work. There's no shortage of that...

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Incredible

in·cred·i·ble
Pronunciation: \(ˌ)in-ˈkre-də-bəl\

1 : too extraordinary and improbable to be believed
2 : Amazing, Extraordinary (incredible skill) (incredible appetite) (incredible woman)
When I first pondered this word a few weeks ago I suspected it may have derived from the root "cred," as in "Lil Wayne and Slim Thug have ascertained street cred with their new tune turn my swag on." Many of us are familiar with the other form that means the same thing: "credible."

It was not a far jump to assume that something described as incredible would simply be not credible.
  • cred
  • credit: cred
  • credible: having cred
  • incredible: not having cred
After all the in added to the beginning of a word often changes its meaning to the opposite:
  • visible/invisible
  • valid/invalid
  • consistent/inconsistent
Perhaps "inconsistent" comes to mind because I suspect the word "incredible" is inconsistent with the remainder of the English language.

Let's look deeper at the word "credible." (It turns out it's a little more specific than "cred"):

1 : offering reasonable grounds for being believed

The key word is "reason." If something is credible it is always reasonable to believe. Now, what is considered "reasonable" varies from one person to the next, but regardless, one might logically surmise that something incredible is always unreasonable to believe. This is not the case, as we can all agree that:
  • Widgets in cans of Guinness infuse the malt beverage with nitrogen when opened...both incredible and reasonable to believe.
  • We all live on a large sphere that orbits an even larger ball of fusion...both incredible and reasonable.
  • This essay might be read by any one of billions across the world immediately after posting...incredible and reasonable.
As I have just proved, what is incredible can also be reasonable. Yes, as reasonable as something that is credible. We, the human race, have forsaken the antonym of the word credible altogether. I might describe this as "amazing" or "extraordinary," but I would never dare defile my native tongue by calling this incredible, since, as I hath shewn, it is nothing of the sort...it is completely, unequivocally, credible.

Therefore, a word that indicates something has absolutely no credit really does not exist.
  • Uncredible? Not a word.
  • Creditless? Nope.
  • Credifaux? No.
I find this ironic, as roughly 80 percent of communication falls into this category, and constitutes 100 percent of content originating from the Internet and mass media. It's almost as if the world's collective marketing forces, and all communities dependent on deception, lobbied Webster to ensure "incredible" was not, in any way, available for use as a word opposite from credible...that would be way too easy to use.

The global assault on the word "incredible" is a conspiracy of vast proportions. It's goal is to discredit all words that can be used to describe the opposite of what is true, reasonable, and correct, in order to make all falsehoods increasingly believable...not based on merit, but on the grounds that nobody knows the right word to describe them. The goal is the eventual destruction of all such words, so that reality itself is not subject to anything "false" or "erroneous," but so all things popular enough to be spoken of can only be described as being true and correct.

On their agenda:
  • "Unbelievable" shall be interpreted as that which can likely be believed.
  • "Undeniable" shall be interpreted as that which is probably deniable.
  • "incorruptible" shall be interpreted as that which can probably be corrupted.
The eventual goal, of course, is to reverse these terms entirely so they are all out possible, as they have already done with incredible:
  • "unbelievable" - that which is entirely believable.
  • "undeniable" - that which is entirely deniable.
  • "incorruptible" - that which can definitely be corrupted.
Our masters have already succeeded in many other cases:
  • "stimulus" - (pertaining to economies) that which depresses.
  • "reinvestment" - (pertaining to communities) that which divests.
  • "reserve" - (pertaining to the federal) that which emits.
Backed into a corner, we have been forced to contrive a colloquial term meaning the opposite of credible...one resilient to the abuses of the establishment. There is only one such example, which has been a rampart for the cause, and which I now submit:

bullshit

This word has stood up to the firestorm of cultural destruction with grace and aplomb, foiling all attempts to suppress it, which has no doubt been tried in many a back room...

"Mr. President, our product has been compared to bullshit. This is not positive for our image, and therefore, something must be done. Our technicians are in the fields now collecting samples from a local herd. Count on us, sir. Before long, every product will be honored to be described as "bullshit." We are confident that within a few short months, consumers will be up to their eyebrows in bullshit and loving every minute of it."

While those mighty stewards of civilization may be able to surgically and graciously relieve us of our wealth by redefining words, there is only so much a people can tolerate. Yes, they may be able to get away with the plunder of our labor, time, and resources. They may be able to convince us that we need to pay their bonuses and support their decisions until they have changed the meaning of every word in the English language.

But, there is a wall that cannot be penetrated. There is one last bastion of truth that can be counted on when every last shred of credibility has been removed from society. When all language has been redefined and all our prosperity has been plundered and wasted, there is one stall wort resource that cannot be polished, spun, or repackaged. It all comes to a head when...

those wizards sit down in front of an actual piece of manure...

when that global committee congregates around a long table staring at that large, steaming pile of cow shit, rubbing their chins...

they will only have one word to describe it...

incredible

Sunday, September 7, 2008

If I can't afford to buy something, should I buy it anyway?

Can we, the people, really afford to buy the failing businesses of Fanny Mae and Freddie Mac?

Oh, I see, they are asking us to forgive their irresponsible behavior and chip in to save the portfolios of their shareholders and other interested parties. I can perhaps do that if given the proper evidence that they understand what caused the problem and are resolving it accordingly. Oh, they are not asking for my consent, or offering evidence. They are using the power of the state to assume I am willing to forgive.

Well then. How do I know the forces that led to their failure are understood? How can I verify that our newly acquired businesses will function properly? Will they be exposed to free-market competition? What is my economic incentive for chipping in?

Something seems off here. Is this the natural, inevitable result of our constitutional republic? Well, let's look at the evidence we do have...

Does a free society favor security holders, banks, and borrowers over others? That doesn't seem to jive with "all men are created equal." What do others have to say about this?
The only stable state is the one in which all men are equal before the law. -Aristotle

In a free society the state does not administer the affairs of men. It administers justice among men who conduct their own affairs. -Walter Lippman
Administering justice among individuals who conduct their own affairs. Okay, that seems fair. So we established a government to enforce justice. The innocent are to be be protected from the scourge of the guilty who seek to distribute accountability to others.

Is a violation of this principle ever acceptable?
It is in justice that the ordering of society is centered. -Aristotle

Justice denied anywhere diminishes justice everywhere. -Martin Luther King Jr.
Mighty strong words there, Martin. Okay, well let's run with that. Hm. An institution funded with our tax dollars (the US Government) purchased two of the worlds largest businesses that are both going bankrupt. I don't understand how that is just.

When I fail nobody gives me money. Why do I need to give money to giant mortgage companies? Oh, it's for the public good. I see. Well, I certainly want to do what's in the public good...

But isn't justice compatible with the public good too? Necessary?

Those CEOs made tens of millions of dollars last year alone. I certainly hope they also care about the public good. By the way, aren't they the ones (with the shareholders) taking the risk in this venture? I didn't know I had anything to lose in this particular venture. I don't remember having the extra cash to risk on this sort of thing...

Oh, wait. On my behalf, the government promised the shareholders that I would pitch in to bail them out if they failed. I see. No wonder they have so many shareholders, all of us have been made accountable for other people's loans and real estate investments. Wait. I never had anything to gain from all this, yet I am accountable somehow? What has been going on here?
Whenever the people are well-informed, they can be trusted with their own government. -Thomas Jefferson
We, my friends, cannot currently be trusted. Most in our country do not understand what is happening. The nationalization of Fanny Mae and Freddie Mac is an insidious breach of economic justice shifting the burden to the innocent through taxes and the diluting and devaluing of our currency.
The line of credit is a promise on behalf of the government to engage in a huge unconstitutional and immoral income transfer from working Americans to holders of GSE [Government Sponsored Enterprise] debt. -Ron Paul
There is no amount of admonition too severe for this type of business/government relationship. Ever since the promises were made...that government would bail out Freddie and Fanny if necessary...the end result was inevitable. These institutions were given an unfair advantage over any competitors attracting more shareholders. Bankers knew it, investors knew it, (some) borrowers knew it, and government officials knew it. This is a textbook monopoly, and like all monopolies, it could not have existed without government favor.

The plan was (and is) a scheme to exploit the masses for the benefit of the few who understand what this racket is all about. Well, it appears to have worked. But we will all suffer on account of it, even the wealthy...
They will come to learn in the end, at their own expense, that it is better to endure competition for rich customers than to be invested with monopoly over impoverished customers. -Frederic Bastiat
Restore freedom and competition to the mortgage industry. Rather than propping up bad business we must expose them to fair competition or we will all pay dearly. A promise that is based on fallacy and not grounded in reality will always be broken eventually. Such was the promise made to Fanny and Freddie. Delaying the inevitable will only corrode the economy to the point that otherwise responsible mortgagees will be forced to foreclose.
Justice in the life and conduct of the State is possible only as first it resides in the hearts and souls of the citizens. -Plato

Friday, September 5, 2008

Dr. Lind's Challenge

The following is a hypothetical discussion between James Lind and the British Navy sometime after 1742:

British Navy: Thousands of our sailors are dying of disease. What should we do?

Dr. Lind: I know.

British Navy: You do?

Dr. Lind: Yes.

British Navy: Withholding crucial, life-saving information?! That's treason! Why haven't you said anything?

Dr. Lind: I have. No one listened.

British Navy: Why didn't anyone listen?

Dr. Lind: Because the cure sounds silly.

British Navy: That doesn't sound like a very good reason. What is the cure?

Dr. Lind: Lemons and limes.

British Navy: That's silly. Go away.

Dr. Lind: See.

British Navy: Go home. We don't believe you.

Dr. Lind: You should.

British Navy: Why?

Dr. Lind: Because I'm right.

British Navy: And what gives you such confidence.

Dr. Lind: Study of history, scientific experiments and empirical evidence.

British Navy: No one would believe me if I told them this. Unacceptable.

Dr. Lind: That's not my problem. I won't get scurvy.

British Navy: Okay, say you're right. You know no one will ever believe you. How dare you risk your own reputation by proposing something so absurd?

Dr. Lind: Because my reputation is not mired in politics, ego, greed, or any influence other than honest discovery through empirical evidence and natural law.

British Navy: Are you suggesting we, the British Navy, are rejecting natural law and evidence?

Dr. Lind: That is what I am suggesting.

British Navy: And therefore you accuse us of killing soldiers by not hauling fruit on our ships?

Dr. Lind: I didn't say that.

British Navy: How dare you accuse the entire British Navy of mass murder?

Dr. Lind: I am not one to accuse, and I would not. Although, it is true that you are rejecting a simple cure to a disease that is killing thousands.

British Navy: No one will take us seriously if we haul lemons and limes on our ships. It would make us look superstitious and weak. Like we are all afraid of scurvy or something. Well, let me be the first to say that we can hack it without your silly limes. Besides, we need that space for all the cannon balls.

Dr. Lind: I cannot force you to believe me, of course, or act. But I am also not persuaded by arrogance, ignorance, pride, vanity, or other factors. If you choose to reject my discovery and do nothing I can only observe and learn more about this particular evil in human nature.

British Navy: You accuse the British Navy of evil? Of being the enemy?

Dr. Lind: No, the enemy is pride, ignorance, arrogance, ego, and prejudice.

British Navy: Kind of like those froggy French bastards. I see what you mean.

Dr. Lind: Not really. Human nature is more complicated. I am only a scientist.

British Navy: You are sympathetic to the French?

Dr. Lind: I didn't say that.

British Navy: Go home before I call the guards.

Dr. Lind: Yes sir.

The British Navy began carrying limes on ships 62 years later.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

2/3rds. Close enough to "Unanimous" for the Republicans.

Alright, if I can't stand politics, why the hell do I write about all the time?

Well, you can't know much about darkness without having experienced at least a mild degree of light, even if it burns the retinas. And oh, it burns...

Someone I admire had a more elegant way of putting it: "He who knows only his own side of the case, knows little of that." -J. S. Mill

Just like a Communist/Socialist must violate her principles by, well, providing for herself, seekers of truth must sometimes cross over to muck around in the most persistent form of error and fallacy (i.e. bullshit) available. There is little debate about what that is: politics.

Being the most productive geyser of bullshit, any seeker of truth must study this particular scourge carefully, regardless of the inevitable damage to one's soul. Yes, politics is bullshit, and a type more persistent than the less explosive hydrothermal bullshit emitters of sales and religion. Here's the breakdown:
  • Salesmen/commercials. These folks sell a good or service at least remotely similar to what they advertise.
  • Religious Institutions. These folks promote morality at least remotely similar to what a reasonably spiritual, ethical deist might consider God's will.
  • Politicians. These folks promise the exact opposite of what they will, in fact, deliver.
Yes, almost any political candidate that offers anything (other than less government) is actually offering the opposite. Old news, but worth repeating.

Don't believe me?
You should.
Why?
Because it is true.

What better example than the proceedings at the Republican National Convention itself. Just a little fun fact that demonstrates the complete meaninglessness of today's politics.

Last night, after the delegates voted, the speaker made the motion to declare the nomination of John McCain "unanimous."

When judging a voice vote on the motion, there was a clear, audible "NO" from the convention floor.

Requiring a 2/3 majority, the speaker should have proceeded with a show of hands and a count. This did not happen. He made the judgment call that 2/3rds had been reached and banged the gavel.

But, there were delegates representing real constituents on that floor that insisted the nomination was not declared "unanimous."

Forgive me if I am misunderstanding the English language, but wouldn't "unanimous" require 100% of the delegates approval anyway?

If this is how they run their conventions, it's no wonder they run government how they do...as if principles must be sacraficed for expedience.

The Democratic convention was no better. Pelosi gave delegates about 1/4 second to respond before declaring the nomination unanimous.

Why do we allow this?

As if you don't know this already, both candidates are more of the same. Each (with the help of our state) requires 50% of your hard work to give you roads, defend you from terrorists, and make sure your kids aren't "left behind." If you aren't on welfare or a governing elite you are a battery in their empire building machine.

Hey, I don't like it either, but I also don't like hangovers, and stopping those isn't possible. Or is it?

From the Rally for the Republic Tuesday night:
Those who have the ability to speak out against wickedness and do not do so are morally culpable. -Lew Rockwell

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Campaign for Liberty

Disclaimer: The following are unsolicited opinions. If you find them objectionable I expect the courtesy of discussion. If you agree completely I accept your silent endorsement.

If you were a colonial in 1776, would you forgive British abuses of power and side with the Loyalists? Or, would you fight for independence?

If you were an East German citizen in 1989, would you accept Soviet crimes and remain silent despite decades of humanitarian abuse? Or, would you help tear down the wall?

Tough question. All signers of the Declaration of Independence committed treason against the British. 5 were tortured and killed. Many others who pledged their honor suffered as well. Countless Soviet dissidents paid dearly.

I once heard someone say..."There are 3 types of people: Those who make things happen, those who watch things happen, and those who don't know anything is happening."

Seems like most don't know that anything is happening. Why?

Are we busy pursuing happiness. I'd say very busy...

So busy we don't have time to understand what's happening, much less do anything about it...

But, what if the very thing that allowed us to pursue that happiness was in jeopardy?

Say I pursue happiness exclusively by brewing beer, which is fairly accurate. I drink what I can, sell the rest, and give away the extra...

If I produce 10 kegs of beer and only need 1, where do the other 9 kegs go? Well, they ought to go to the person who needs them most, right? That person will pay the highest price so, hopefully, I can sell them all and afford to make more beer. If no one needs the beer, all gets wasted (no more beer). If anyone I know needs beer because they are dying of thirst they can drink all they need (obviously) until I can no longer afford to make beer.
If an exchange between two parties is voluntary, it will not take place unless both believe they will benefit from it. Most economic fallacies derive from the neglect of this simple insight, from the tendency to assume that there is a fixed pie, that one party can only gain at the expense of another. -Milton Friedman
Government is acting like the person I know who is dying of thirst. But, instead of drinking the beer, it wastes it or gives it to rich folks.
If I spend somebody else’s money on somebody else, I’m not concerned about how much it is, and I’m not concerned about what I get. And that’s government. And that’s close to 40% of our national income. -Another good one from Milton Friedman [full quote here]
Okay, so I can understand how it could be wasted, but what justifies giving it to rich folks? Nothing, really. They are simply the ones that can afford to use media to perpetuate the myth that America would crumble if their business went bankrupt. All the while they've used government to shift the rules in their favor. So, your hard-earned money is basically spent keeping insolvent, corrupt businesses afloat.

It sucks prosperity from each and every one of us, but mostly the poor. Yes, it steals from the folks who are most thirsty! It makes them work harder for less.

Then, to prove it is actually dying of thirst government ensures we are always under threat by provoking fear. Hundreds of billions are spent on unconstitutional, unnecessary, provocative wars. We pay for it dearly with money, sweat, and (if you are a soldier) blood. And what do we get in return? An agitated, dangerous hornets nest - it is an awful cycle.

And we wonder why we have to work so hard to make a living...

When it comes right down to it, who are you going to trust to save your thirsty friend? The government or yourself? Likewise, if you are the one suffering, are you going to drink the blood of your neighbor or accept his/her goodwill?

If you can't trust your neighbor, how can you expect to trust an entity that cannot hear, see, or feel?

You are an American citizen in 2008. Are you going to permit the seizure of our monetary system, oppressive income taxes, state violations of privacy, and endless unconstitutional aggressive wars against an undefined enemy?

Or are you going to use the freedoms that remain to restore those rights so dearly earned in the War for Independence and maintained through diligence ever since? Will US citizens wait until circumstances are so dire that greater sacrifices are required? The recent deprivation of civil liberties demand we use the freedoms we have left to restore them to their appropriate place.
When they took away the second amendment for national security, I was silent because I did not own a gun.

When they took away the fourth amendment for national security, I was silent because I did not deal drugs.

When they took away the fifth amendment for national security, I was silent because I was innocent.

When they took away the first amendment for national security, I was silent because I can no longer say anything about it. -Steve Wozinak
There is no stopping the Campaign for Liberty. It began thousands of years ago in Greece and Rome and its line extends directly through Ron Paul's message and campaign. Everywhere the brushfires of liberty have ever spread throughout history carry the same marks...tolerance, peace, honesty, and the brutal truth. Alright, I think that's enough for now.

Go Ron Paul!
But let it not be said that we did nothing. Let not those who love the power of the welfare/warfare state label the dissenters of authoritarianism as unpatriotic or uncaring. Patriotism is more closely linked to dissent than it is to conformity and a blind desire for safety and security. Understanding the magnificent rewards of a free society makes us unbashful in its promotion, fully realizing that maximum wealth is created and the greatest chance for peace comes from a society respectful of individual liberty. -Ron Paul

Monday, August 4, 2008

The rEVOLution

A quick note to brothers and sisters of the rEVOLution.

Here's a good video to explain what's going on.

fyi

Friends don't let friends become victims of empire.

To hang out with a bunch of other rEVOLutionaries, join us at the Target Center on Sept. 2:

Rally for the Republic

If nothing else it's an excuse to take a day off and hang out with a bunch of cool/interesting people.

And, in case you're someone who cares about being "patriotic," it's also good for your country.

Oh, and in case you are heir to enormous wealth and your family is using government to fleece the people, you might want to skip this one...

To Dr. Ron Paul, if you are reading this, congrats. After 30 years you seem to have awoken the beast of liberty. May you continue to skillfully wrestle its mangy tuft until the last plunderer of man has been exposed and thoroughly trampled.
You just can't beat the person who never gives up. -Babe Ruth