Two lambs and a wolf sat down to lunch

Democracy is not freedom. Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to eat for lunch. Freedom comes from the recognition of certain rights which may not be taken, not even by a 99% vote. -Marvin Simkin, "Individual Rights"

One plus one is three

[A wolf and a lamb are at a table peacefully eating dinner. Wolf says:]
If what, my friend, you say is true,
then one plus one is three, not two.
One plus two is three, it's plain,
and two plus one is three the same.
But tell me, lamb, how can it be,
that one plus one does equal three?

[Lamb explains]
It's quite simple, you will see
how one plus one is surely three.
You confess, and know it's true,
that three does equal one plus two.
So, I say, doubt not the sum,
that three is also one plus one.

[Wolf]
My truest, kindest, dearest friend,
my faith in you can have no end.
But when I take this kettle drum,
and then I add another one.
I tally each just like a shoe.
A pair is never three but two.

[Lamb]
But wait! You mustn't close the case.
It seems so simple on its face.
But, if you choose to free your mind,
the truth I trust you'll surely find.
And while you do not see it yet,
take heed, no need to sulk or fret.

In this hand I hold a schmickle.
This one bears a turquoise pickle.
One I raise up to the sky,
the other dangles with a tie.
And now, I've proven, must I shout?
Just two? You surely have some doubt.

[Wolf]
No, I haven't, I'm afraid.
Put together, two are made.
A mathematician I am not,
nor the smartest of the lot.
But if that lot is me plus you,
the total is not three but two.

[Lamb]
A stubborn bulldog you've become.
To what do you owe one plus one?
Seems to me it's quite a lot.
So, wolf, let me tell you what:
John, my friend, put up our coat,
and let us take a little vote. [John is another lamb]

My friend, this is democracy.
And John and I, we each vote three.
I'm afraid your vote of one,
is clearly less my dearest chum.
Perhaps you now begin to see,
how one plus one does equal three.

[Wolf]
You have made your strongest case.
And put me in a lonely place.
But greater numbers less one fact,
in this case, only can subtract.
You've proven nothing, don't you see?
But weakness in democracy.

[Lamb]
John and I are not afraid.
We have our minds securely made.
You will believe us, this is true.
You will reject your precious two.
Come now, friend, it's only math.
Spare your life, and awful wrath. [Lambs looking hostile at wolf]

[Wolf]
Friends, dear John, plus one makes two,
you challenge more than what is true.
A fourth can make this vote a tie.
My only friend out in the nigh.
Reader, I must yield to you.
Does one plus one make three or two?

"If two, proceed to next page. If three, the page after."

[If two, the three they go back to eating dinner.]

[If three, the wolf is alone with fur hanging out of his mouth.]