The Children Are Our Future

Quantitative Easing Explained

The content of the following video is common knowledge among a growing number of people. Reporters are doing stories, people are making movies, and there are even children's books about this (including mine). But, no matter how much we are educated, most Americans don't take this seriously. They don't believe it. Why? I have observed a dangerous dichotomy:

1. The thoughtless and uninformed simply don't care and don't think about it.
2. The thoughtful and informed are not confident enough in their understanding given the huge scope, number of factors, and unknowns. This is reasonable.

This leaves an interesting situation. Because of this easy-to-identify dichotomy, a small number of folks at Goldman Sachs and the Fed have popular support in their practice of overtly and legally robbing the general population. It's brilliant. Our collective silence gives their individual consent. The few who see the racket are watching Ben and his buddies shovel our money from the bank into their money bin while most of everyone we know–our friends and family–are part of the bucket brigade. Hell, we are letting them get away with it by doing things like voting for their robber friends like Mark Dayton. He has openly revealed that he doesn't get it, will (at least implicitly) attempt to help them, and we still vote him into office because people think the candidate who does get it killed a woman's son while driving drunk because of some disingenuous attack ad!

The sad (and dangerous) thing is: I don't blame Goldman Sachs. I don't think folks like me blame Goldman Sachs either. In fact, I think some who are watching this think there is some sick justice in the fact that all of the willfully ignorant people around us are quietly being robbed and exploited. Some think it is almost worth being robbed themselves to know that the idiots all around them are looking the other direction while the community's bank accounts are being looted. This is the dark side. It is filled with apathy and disgust at the nature of man. I choose not to consider the robbery justice. It is a crime, and something worth writing about.

The Swaddle

Very young people have a tendency to remind you how genuinely helpless they are. There is no one more desperate and dependent than a screaming, hungry infant. They are obsessed. They cannot be distracted with shiny objects, or the bouncy-bouncy, or even a pacifier (in my case, pinky finger) for long. Hard-coded into their brains is the need for a nipple planted deep in their mouth and the procurement of sweet, sweet milk. In want of this they are certain of their immanent death. Waking from a deep slumber, the first tingle of hunger marks the inevitable descent to a slow, miserable, painful emaciation. They taste death. They do not hope. They do not believe or wish. They do not have faith that milk will arrive. They only know that they are sure to die, and that is all. Without the warm fluid flowing down their throats, there is only darkness.

Finding the breast between his lips, the infant, somehow, still cannot believe he has been saved. He tests, and then resumes crying. His lips touch the one thing that grants him life, and he refuses, pulling away. His own tiny hands flail about, intercepting the connection, preventing what he requires. He sucks on his fingers and then wails, cheek pressed against the only thing that will relieve his pain. The loving mother, determined to relieve his suffering, grows frustrated as his small but powerful fists and fingernails batter and scrape her tender flesh. The restless infant knows nothing other than to resist the one thing he desperately needs and desires. At this point, particularly when mother and infant are frustrated to tears, the father's role becomes essential. He takes the infant gently in his arms, places him on a flat surface, and initiates the swaddle.

swad·dle tr.v. swad·dled, swad·dling, swad·dles
~To wrap or bind in bandages; swathe.

Perhaps the most enjoyable part of being a new dad has been learning to completely immobilize my wily and self-destructive son so that breast feeding is plausible. This velcro-enhanced swaddling blanket is basically a straight jacket for kids, and works really well. Here is a quick, step-by-step swaddle tutorial...

1. Place swaddling blanket on flat surface.


2. Procure baby.


3. Place baby in blanket.

4. Pull foot hoodie thing over legs and restrain right arm to the side.

5. Wrap left flap over velcro patch while holding down right arm.

6. Wrap left flap all the way across and hold down the left arm.

7. Tuck the left flap tightly around to the back.

8. Pull right flap across torso and secure tightly with velcro patches.

Voila! He's swaddled.

9. Place in front of mommy for a peaceful feeding. He is now less capable of self-destructive behavior and ready to chow down! Yum.


The swaddle is really a temporary measure. While the binding may be enjoyable for the parent, it should only be practiced when absolutely necessary, and not purely for recreation. When the baby is old enough to feed unrestrained without causing harm to himself and others, swaddling should be ceased (sniff).